As regular readers might know, my lovely wife and I run a few businesses.
Some of those are online. We deal with a whole range of idiots.
And sure, I shouldn’t call some customers idiots. But they are what they are.
Today we had an idiot complain bitterly to us that we’d sold him a product he could get cheaper on Amazon.
No shit Sherlock!
He did go on a bit about how we were dodgy and asking how we slept at night…..all because Amazon sell the same product cheaper!
Complained To The Attorney General’s Department in Missouri
He cced his email to us to the Attorney General’s Department in Missouri as a complaint about us. Because they’d be interested in that…….not!
We responded to his bitching and moaning and finished the email with:
“And yes, you’re off our Christmas Card list as well.
And I’ll be telling Santa to put you on the “Naughty” list.
So now you’re in big trouble.”
Our Email To The Attorney General’s Department in Missouri
We then emailed the Attorney General’s Department in Missouri with our response to his complaint – not sure if I was serious enough??
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“Hello Attorney General’s Office
I forgot to cc you in on my response to Eric as per our emails below.
Seems as he copied you in on his email to us as some form of complaint.
I’m sure the Attorney General’s Office has an entire department dedicated to complaints from people who found they could buy products cheaper on Amazon (cough).
I suspect it is, without question, one of the key law and order issues facing Missouri and there will be a whole team looking into Eric’s email (cough, cough).
As you’ll see from Eric waste of time emails to both you and I, he’s not very smart. Annoying, sure. But smart……not so much.
As you’ll see from my response to him we’ve reported him to a far greater authority than the Attorney General’s Office of Missouri.
That’s right. We’ve told Santa to put him on the “Naughty” list.
Can I respectfully ask that you also ask Santa to place this idiot on the Naughty list?
While Santa has been very good to me over the years and granted my every request, I just feel that a letter from your Office would carry some additional weight and guarantee his inclusion.
If you can help I’ll be sure to tell him to put you guys on the “Nice” list (I hope that doesn’t constitute an attempt to bribe a government official).
And the answer is “Yes” to the question you have in your head. I do have too much time on my hands today.
Kind Regards”
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At least I think I’m funny!
Cheers,
