How Facebook Is Going To Screw Your Life – And You Probably Won’t Even Know It

by Brendon Sinclair on June 30, 2010

Okay, right off the top I better tell you this article is loaded with profanity and offensive comment.

If you’re not comfortable with that, then don’t read on.

Let’s get straight to the point.

Facebook Is Going To Screw You

Facebook is, I have little doubt, going to screw the future of thousands upon thousands of its users.

And it’s going to do it in such a way that the poor victims won’t even know it happened.

The worst thing about it is the people getting screwed over are doing it to themselves.

You’re amongst friends on Facebook, so you can be yourself.  Right?

Wrong.

So very wrong.

You’re Not Amongst Friends

You are most definitely not amongst friends.

The enemy lurks within.

And his/her name is usually yours.

A Facebook friend isn’t really a friend.

More than that, let’s be clear – Facebook isn’t your friend.

The guys at Facebook simply can’t believe the mountain of personal information users are giving it each and every day.

As Facebook founder Mark Zuckenburg said of users providing tons of personal information to Facebook: “Dumb fucks.”

To understand how it’s happening, all you need to do is take a different perspective with what people post on Facebook.

Meet Peter – He’s Screwing His Future

Take a look at the Facebook ‘Info’ page of a 16 year old local boy I’ll call Peter.

Because Peter and I have a mutual friend, I can see pretty much everything he has on his Facebook account.

As you can see, he happily shares his views on God.

A Different Perspective

Let’s take the perspective that Peter hasn’t – let’s understand that what he writes is online forever.  Because it is.

Now Peter is a exceptionally talented soccer/football player here in Queensland – it’s quite likely he could be considered to play representative soccer.

Where that could lead to is anyone’s guess.

But I’m not guessing when I say that if a potential coach, selector or soccer administrator sees his Facebook account his chances of making that rep side are practically nil.

There’s is so much damage that sharing that religious view can do, it is simply idiotic to do it.

Let’s guess how others with varying perspective might view this information:

  • Let’s say that soccer coach is a religious man – Peter is no chance of making the team.
  • Let’s say that soccer administrator understands the damage to the brand of the team and the sport this could potentially do – Peter ain’t getting selected.

Peter doesn’t have any awareness of just how offensive his Facebook page is.  That’s obvious by what he has posted on it.

Even Barack Obama’s advice to kids wanting to become the President of the USA was “Be careful of what you put on Facebook.”

Same goes for Peter if he wants to get a job, become a teacher, become a lawyer, be a Scout leader, run for public office or any other number of opportunities that life might present.

If people judging him for any of these sort of roles finds this, his goose is cooked.

What Are Young Kids Doing On Facebook?

Now, you may think that’s highly offensive. And you’d be right.

You may even question why I wouldn’t edit out the ‘c’ word.

Well, here’s why.

It’s because that very same word is in plenty of the profiles I’ve looked at.

Which brings me to my next point.

Throwing A 10 Year Old To The Wolves

What the hell are young kids doing on Facebook?

A friend’s 10 year old daughter is on Facebook and has various older friends (cousins, uncles, etc).

That beautiful little 10 year girl can see every bit of the profanity, sexual content and offensive stuff that you’ve seen here already and will see below.

What are her parents thinking?

Who in their right mind would allow their 10 year old access to the ramblings, photos and videos of complete strangers?

(One of the videos this 10 yo would have recently been exposed to via one of her ‘friends’ is of a chimpanzee in a zoo forcing oral sex from a frog – sounds weird and disturbing just writing about it!)

With the posting and messaging capabilities of Facebook, it’s like dumping her in a room full of strangers.

Insane.  And dangerous.

The Local High School Kid

This next person is the captain of a local high school.  The majority of his Facebook friends (all 342 of them) would be, I’d guess, fellow students.

The way this guy communicated to many people on his Facebook page is via the charming phrase “Oi Cunts”.

He’s so fond of that expression that he was a proud member of the group called something like “Oi Cunt is a perfectly fine way to address people”.

What an appalling example to his fellow students.

Here’s some more from him:

Sure, they all think it’s funny……for now.   They might think he’s quite the rebel, a bit cool.

Won’t be so cool when he misses out on that $50,000 University scholarship when the University checks his Facebook profile and sees what a buffoon he is.

Dumbass.

Next up Is Angry Codey

Then there’s angry 16 yo Codey (again, a friend of one of my Facebook friends – so I see his stuff).

His profile picture shows him dressed in the uniform of the local surf lifesaving movement here on the Gold Coast.

Let’s say Codey here is going for that job he really needs.

If the employer, like 45% of employers do now, checks him out on Facebook, the chances of him getting that job are pretty much nil.

Let’s see what we could make of Codey:

  • Aggressive
  • Poor conflict resolution
  • Anger management issues
  • Poor decision making
  • Wants to solve conflict with violence
  • Offensive
  • Immature

This is this person as a brand in many people’s eyes.

Put simply, anyone who reads this kid’s Facebook page will think a whole lot less of him.

Want To Be Robbed?  Facebook Can Help!

A mate recently won $11,000 on a horse race.

He was pretty excited about it and announced it to the world on Facebook.

I saw his post and gave him a call.

“Mate, congrats but I’d take that down if I were you.  You do realise your friend’s friends can see your update?

If you have 300 friends and each of those people have 30 friends, that’s almost 9,000 people you don’t know who you’ve told you have $11,000 cash sitting in your house.

Someone could figure out your address in 5 minutes from the information you have online and this guy on the right could be at your front door wielding a knife in 6.”


My Sister-In-Law Told Every Local Thief Her House Would Be Empty

My brother and his wife recently visited my state for a holiday.

On her Facebook account my sister-in-law gave a countdown of days and hours before her and her entire family left to travel 3,000 kms away.

As I said to her at dinner half joking, “There’s probably a guy going through your things right now – he knows when you left, he knows you haven’t got a dog and he knows you’re not coming back for a couple of days.”

Don’t Want Your 60 Inch Plasma Anymore – Get Rid Of It With Facebook’s Help!

Then there was another mate’s son who announced on Facebook his dad had just purchased a new, huge TV.

That’ll be gone by Tuesday!

Please Rob Me was a site set up to warn about oversharing with social media – it tracked social media data to let thieves know when you’ll be out!

Why would you want to share sensitive information with tons of people you don’t know?

Don’t Think Changing Your Privacy Settings Will Save You

And don’t think for one minute if you change your privacy settings that others/non-friends won’t see what you write.

You see, Facebook haven’t got such a great record at protecting your privacy.

And people aren’t always who they say they are online.

  1. That hot bikini model who just ‘friended’ you may be someone trying to deceive youor worse.
  2. Add in that researchers at VeriSign’s iDefense group discovered a hacker was selling Facebook user names and passwords in an underground hacker forum.  He had about 1.5 million accounts – and was selling them for between $25 and $45!

Are you 100% sure you know all your Facebook ‘friends’?

Are you the only one with access to your account?  Are you absolutely sure?

Miss Out On Uni, Lose Your Job, & Have Debt Collectors Chasing You

  • According to a 2008 Kaplan study, one in 10 college admissions officers routinely check out college applicants’ Facebook and MySpace pages.   38% of them found posts and pictures that reflected poorly on those prospective students.

“Miss Swann was called into Stephen Ivell’s office and fired on the spot before being marched from the premises in Clacton-on-Sea, Essex.

Yesterday, she said she was shocked at her treatment as her comments had been on a personal site and not intended to be seen by outsiders  -  least of all her employer.”

Ha!  Good one Miss Swann!

“But the fact it was a private conversation between me and another girl from work … it wasn’t even intended for the person I was writing about to read it,” said Coles checkout chick Ms Marshall.

It ain’t private Ms Marshall.  That’s the thing that you just don’t get.

  • 45% of employers screen social media profiles – just imagine what they would find in potential employees (I have a client who refused to interview an applicant for a $60,000 pa position based on their offensive email address.  She saw it as reflecting very poor judgment. ).

You’re Not Just Sharing With Friends

What it all means is that you’re not just sharing your stuff with ‘friends’.

You’re sharing it with everyone forever.

Forever.

I’m Not Saying Don’t Use Facebook

Look, I’m not saying don’t use Facebook.

What I am saying is don’t tell everything to your Facebook friends.

  • Assume your mum reads your Facebook account (because she probably will).
  • Assume your potential/future employer will read everything you write (because they probably will).
  • Assume your future son/daughter will read everything you write (because they probably will).

Be discreet.  Be measured.  Be sensible.

And remember this.

Facebook Doesn’t Care About You

At all.

Facebook just wants as much of your private information as possible so it can make as much money from advertisers eager to get a hold of that data.

They’ll happily encourage you to be indiscreet and screw up your entire life just so they can make a few extra $$$.

That’s not right.

Use Facebook.  Don’t let it use you.

Cheers

Brendon

Cheers,

{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Adam Trickett July 1, 2010 at 1:00 am

Wow…eye opener much?

After reading this, the first thing I did was completely audit my Facebook profile (I think it’s ok, now!).

I’m guessing the same rules apply to the use of other networks as well. I’m always trying to be careful of what I say on Twitter as well as Facebook.

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2 Joel July 1, 2010 at 6:05 am

I think a lot of these things are down to ignorance which comes with any new media. People treat it like IM or text messaging when it’s not, it’s public. Your last line “Use Facebook. Don’t let it use you.” is perfect. Facebook is actually great, but can be terrible.

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3 Brendon Sinclair July 1, 2010 at 9:00 am

Howdy Adam

Oh yes, all these social networks are the same. It’s all about managing your personal brand these days because everyone gets to see you warts and all if you let them.

Agreed Joel. Facebook can be, if used right, an excellent way to connect with old buddies, etc. But used the wrong way and it can be a disaster.

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4 Terry July 1, 2010 at 12:40 pm

Well written as always Brendon. I have very little personal info. On my facbook and try to be careful about what I say. I think I have only 3 friends I have never met. Will fwd this on to my sons

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5 Dan Norris July 1, 2010 at 1:08 pm

Good read mate however unless I’ve got this wrong, if your profile is set to private which is pretty easy to do only your friends can see what you are saying so the causes for issues like you have pointed out above are either (a) people are stupid and say silly things without making their profiles private or (b) they are stupid because they friend someone who is pretending to be someone else. I’m not sure Facebook deserve all the blame for people’s stupidity. Perhaps there is a role for schools / parents to help kids understand the technology.

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6 James December 1, 2010 at 8:35 pm

I can see what your saying (and I do agree that there is many stupid users of FaceBook) however FaceBook are constantly changing their privacy settings, and everytime they do, your account suddenly becomes open to the world until you login and modify all your privacy settings again.

I am very careful with my private data and do not share much info on FaceBook, but it doesn’t stop FaceBook trying to force me to share more data, or all of a sudden changing my privacy settings when they roll out a new feature.

When I am on FaceBook, I spend more time going over Privacy Settings and their ever changing Terms and Conditions and Privacy Policy.

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7 Tracey Moore July 1, 2010 at 1:16 pm

Brendon,

This article needs to be read by all of our youth, who have no idea how much information they divulge or the consequences of what they say on Facebook or any other social networking site for that matter. I too have made my two children read your article.
Good luck to Mel for Sunday x

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8 Brendon Sinclair July 1, 2010 at 1:41 pm

Thanks terry – good stuff.

Howdy Dan – I agree, it’s not Facebook’s fault. It’s just a tool.
Just about every Facebook acct I saw was set to allowing friends of friends read your stuff.

That’s insane.

And I’d bet that 60% of people have no idea where to alter their privacy settings (most wouldn’t give it a second thought after setting up Facebook).

Hi Tracey – thanks for the input. Kids have no idea of the consequences of what they do. I know I didn’t think when I was 16 “How will this affect me when I’m 30?”

But these days, their actions will be with them forever.

Mel’s ready to go!

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9 Dave Beck July 1, 2010 at 2:42 pm

Nice write-up Brendon!

I am constantly shaking my head at what some friends post on Facebook, quite often friends that you would say are technologically savvy.

Dave

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10 Mak Songhurst July 1, 2010 at 4:28 pm

Can’t agree more with this article Brendon . Perception is reality! Even if it’s not you making these comments. If people perceive that you hang around with ignorant grubs you must be one as well. Choose your friends wisely.

Mark.

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11 Michelle Gaby July 2, 2010 at 8:31 am

Well Done Brendon – as usual
Can’t wait to forward this one on to most of my friends with children. Points are made perfectly for them, thanks again. Perhaps you should do a monthly write up on this specific issue. I’m sure you could go on & on…

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12 Pete July 8, 2010 at 8:49 pm

Brendon,

When it comes to locking down your facebook you can’t go past:
http://www.reclaimprivacy.org/

It goes through and checks your settings and recommends/fixes potential issues for you.

-Pete.

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13 James December 1, 2010 at 8:43 pm

@pete: thanks for the link, I’ll be sure to check it out.

There is a site (Passive Aggressive Notes) that has some excellent samples of why you should be careful about what you share and do on FaceBook. One of the links is http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2009/08/10/why-facebook-is-sooo-gonna-get-you-fired/ and my personal favourite is exhibit D, which is a girl who friended her boss then made a complaint about her boss on FaceBook, I won’t give the ending away though.

One thing that I have noticed on FaceBook, is the users that have no concern over their privacy whatsoever, I have managed to view profiles of friends of friends of friends, where they have had their email on display, telephone number, photos, personal data such as birthdate, age, location, schools, employers, basically their life on FaceBook, if I was a spammer or conman, I am sure FaceBook would be a very lucrative tool for my trade.

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